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TOPIC: Ok my video take on aphantasia

Ok my video take on aphantasia 3 years 5 months ago #2261

  • Rondy
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Hi Nathan,
That was an eye-opening video for me, for two reasons:

1) I've clearly been pronouncing Aphantasia incorrectly.
Asymmetric - no symmetry.
Amoral - no morals.
Atheism - no relion.
Affantasia?
Discuss....

2) I came across Aphantasia while trying to help my son with his difficulties with handwriting, spelling, writing stories, doing maths, basically all the things they expect you to learn and eventually display competency at in primary school. All the same things I struggled with at school. I have trouble with planning or working on anything that starts with a blank page and ends with something not well defined. So does my son. The closest diagnosis to what might have been our problems was when he was tested for dyslexia at age 6 and we were told there was a chance he may have a short-term working-memory capacity shortage. This got me thinking that there might be a genetic link, as my own father displayed similar traits. Since then, further tests have discounted this and I've been looking for another answer... Then I read the BBC article and it all made sense!
Back in August 2015, we did the abridged Aphantasia test and both score minimal marks, with my daughter and wife scoring way way higher. Bingo! We had a name for this sucker!
Then I saw your video.
Who is this guy? This isn't right! He can speak in long, well-constructed sentences that sound reasoned and well thought out. He says he thinks that's how Aphants like him are able to compensate for having no internal imagery. This doesn't make sense anymore.
I, like my son (and my father), have difficulty communicating verbally in the way you describe. For me, that inner monologue goes on, the words are there, it all makes sense, until I come to vocalise it, then BOOM! Gone. Halfway through a sentence and nope. No longer there, that word, that simple word... Trying to drag it out of somewhere... Nope. That sentence I just spent the last few minutes repeating over and over so I wouldn't look a dick when I said it wrong, just made me look like a dick.

Good job on the video. I am in awe.

I've written to Dr. Adam Zeman, hoping to assist in further study, as we live less than two hours drive from Exeter University.
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Ok my video take on aphantasia 3 years 3 months ago #2469

  • CanISee
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"I see the back of my eyelids. .. .." :)

My internal monologue is constant too, unless there's something else that specifically requires word processing to a degree that can stop it (although somehow I often manage to do both at once). I know in therapy they're telling me to distract myself from my obsessive-thoughs/scarey-thoughts and their suggestions start with things like "wash the dishes"... but that's when they're going to most, cause doing the dishes takes no processing power for me... But I don't know how a normal person could be distracted by that enough to quiet the mind either... although maybe they have much less words than I do to begin with and aren't thinking in a stream of dialogue/thoughts the same way I am and the simple act of dishes -would- take it away. O_O Either that or my brain is like quad-core. :P

I noticed while I was sitting looking outside and trying to just get some sunlight and trying to relax myself on purpose and do as close as I can to forming something like meditating or "fully present"-ness, I had constant dialogue. I was like "maybe I'll just try to look at the clouds over there, ah, that's actually really pretty, I'm going to grab my camera and take pictures. It's really pretty here at this angle, that's a pretty tree. Oh, I'm thinking with alot of words... this isn't a quiet mind... I need to try not to, ok quiet.... *random song lyrics start going through head, like if I were to sing the song but in my best effort to sound like the original, but a bit closer than I'm capable*... augh, I can't actually have a silent mind, if I'm not -thinking- something I have a song going...." Soooo, I can't seem to have a "silent" mind... and it makes me wonder... I often ask people what they're thinking about (especially if to me they look pensive), sometimes I'm met with annoyance and a reply that they aren't thinking -anything-. Can someone actually literally have no thought going... or... augh. T_T

Ref the trauma: Unfortunately I fall in the group that while I don't have a video/image so to speak, I relive it anyway in a way (and the times I do have the brief "near flash" it's always something traumatic... Mostly I have past dialogue in my head... unfortunately words -really- effect me and guilt trips and things like that, so the memories of the bad past dialogues or thoughts of potential future dialogues along similar lines really negatively effect me and make me a mess. (I recently found out I have PTSD, I was triggered when someone shared verbally some memories I'd forgotten, and some other information, and my brain started peicing together various facts and information and it just broke entirely and I became a non-functioning mess.)
~*~ Still figuring it all out, I either have aphantasia or weak visualization ability, definitely 0 purposeful visualization. ~*~
~*~ I suffer from PTSD, Anxiety, Depression, OCD; and potentially some sort of high functioning autism, but that one is unconfirmed. ~*~
Last Edit: 3 years 3 months ago by CanISee.
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Ok my video take on aphantasia 3 years 2 months ago #2667

  • KRamis
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This video is what led me here so thank you so much!
I do not see things in my mind and I'm okay with that.
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Ok my video take on aphantasia 3 years 1 week ago #3113

  • Nathan Buzby
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I feel bad I have not been on the forums for a few months, I tend to go into hiding during the winter time and disconnect from everything, including most social activities such as social media and forums hehe. I really enjoyed the feed back, and the questions as well, the nice thing about speculative thinking is when others vocalize differences as well. Aphantasia is one part of a complex whole, how things like personality come into play, differences in short term and long term memory encoding, culture, personal trauma, all of these things will shape people differently and thus their experiences will be vastly different, even when sharing a condition like aphantasia. I would be interested to see how this intersects with things like the big 5 personality typologies, High self monitoring vs low self monitoring behaviors, etc.
Tone Disclaimer: If you read something I write and feel I am trolling, please read it again and imagine instead you are talking to a teacher or professor. I do not write from a place of self-superiority or ego, I favor dialectical conversations that seek to find underlying causation and truth.
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Ok my video take on aphantasia 3 years 1 week ago #3134

  • CanISee
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If there's a particular test you think would be good for that last bit you're pondering, I'd take it if you link it. :P (Though it may be a while as I vanish for weeks before checking again randomly when I remember.) :p
~*~ Still figuring it all out, I either have aphantasia or weak visualization ability, definitely 0 purposeful visualization. ~*~
~*~ I suffer from PTSD, Anxiety, Depression, OCD; and potentially some sort of high functioning autism, but that one is unconfirmed. ~*~
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